Custody evaluation? Here's how to screw it up.

More and more, Florida judges are relying on custody evaluations and social investigations to determine who should get custody of the kids.

Both of these methods (and some other ones like Guardians as Litem that aren't used as much any more) involve using professionals to evaluate the parents psychologically, speak with witnesses, talk to the kids, look at school records, that sort of thing. Judge rely on these tools pretty heavily in making custody decisions. In fact, some judges even read the conclusions of the social investigation reports and--bam!--case closed. Winner determined. Even those judges who don't just base their decisions solely on the reports are very heavily influenced by them.

So you think the conclusions in these reports are important to your custody case? Oh, yeah. Majorly.

Wanna lose? Do this. Completely destroy the other parent when you talk to the investigator. Rant and rave about how bad a parent that person is. Talk about how no child should ever be allowed on the same planet as them. Bring up every tiny thing you can think of about how awful a parent the other person is.

Wanna win? Try this. "My spouse (or ex-girlfriend or whatever) is a good parent. I'm proud of the way he/she always makes sure the homework is done. He/she gets along great with the kids, and they love him/her very much. There are some things that concern me, though, and I'd like to share them with you, because I think you'll agree that, even though he/she is overall an excellent parent, the kids are better off having more time with me. These are my concerns..."

Now I'm not saying to downplay child abuse or molestation or something horrific. You know that you'll have to disclose those things. You also know that you'll win those types of cases. I'm only saying that, in the typical case, ripping the other parent apart is only going to make you look bad, not the other parent. Ripping the other person apart is the quickest way to lose.